Tour de San Luis: Día Seis
This race does not suck.
- “Riding Joe Dombrowski’s OFFICIAL RACE bike around the finish area.”—Emiliano Granado #peacocking #bikepirate
I FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
ARGENTINA DOES NOT SUCK
ARGENTINA DOES NOT SUCK
“Thank God for Magical Realism”
JANUARY 24, 2015
SAN LUIS/MIRADOR DEL SOL, MERLO, ARGENTINA: Manual for Speed is excited to announce that Argentina does not suck, only the metropolitan area of San Luis does. The idea began to form as early as the Mountain Top Finish of Etapa 2, followed by the Egyptian Walls in the mountains of Stage 4. And now, the Sierras of Comechingones! And what’s more, Joe Dombrowski thinks this race is hard, real hard, like readjust your expectations and assumptions hard.
Any race that has Egyptian Walls, a culture of personal responsibility, no traffic laws, the Sierras of Comechingones, and climbs enough to make Joe Dombro sweat is swell, just swell, as far as we’re concerned. And listen, we’re not taking anything back, everything we’ve said up until this point is still true, it’s just that the net-net, after yesterday’s Etapa 6, is Positive not Negative. For details and the science behind our new net-Positive attitude we’ve shown our work here (in the form of each individual factor paired with it’s total net-net (nN) score).
- Cousin’s Fiat: -2
- San Luis: -10
- Hotel Huarpes: -10
- Wifi: -137
- Hotel Huarpes Zumba: -10
- Lack of Vegetables/Food Diversity: -4
- Helado: + 5
- Vista Suites Spa & Golf work area: +4
- Los Robles: +9
- HACU Situation: -6
- Transfers: -10
- Culture of Personal Liability: +10
- Cortado Inconsistency: -1
- Stage 1: -5
- Stage 2: +1
- Stage 3: -8
- Stage 4: +2
- Stage 5: +3
- Stage 6: +456
- Total nN: +287
Oh and another thing: sure, the Tour Down Under has the internet, English (kinda), exceptional espresso experiences, Tubular Tommy and Co., AirBnB, fans, the Pacific Ocean, Farmers Union Iced Coffee and Post-Emergence Road Systems, but come on, what about the walls?, does it have walls? No, it does not.
II Today's Observations
- We are the only people who paid to be at this race. Everyone else: racers, team staff, media, they all had their major travel expenses comped by the race organization. We’re thinking about asking for our money They've got good looking hammocks here.”Keiran Best, MFS QOTDback or for reimbursement. The thing is… we figure at best they offer us store credit, and that store credit, knowing how store credit goes, would likely expire at the end of this year, approximately 21 days before the 2016 Tour San Luis.
- The Rag (El Trapito) is an Argentine archetype!!!
- This race does not suck.
- This race has Magical Realism.
- This race has real mountains.
- The Falkland Islands, let’s talk about them. Based on the volume and ubiquitous nature of Las Malvinas-related banner/posters/flags/literature/slogans/etc. it’s clearly a BIG DEAL. Also, the messaging is state sponsored? Sorta like, “Hey, in case you forgot, the English STILL have the other National Treasure.” Dear Unbiased Historians and Socio-Political Professors, what’s up? What’s at stake here? Please illuminate us. ((Further Reading: (1) A pretty great photo project by Argentine photographer Juan Travnik; (2) A documentary entitled The Falklands War: The Untold Story on YouTube that our publisher watched at 1:00 AM once while deep in a Falklands-related late-night Wikipedia Vortex. Please also note the YouTube comments—for entertainment purposes only, however.)) The great Argentine writer Jorge Luis Borges once said, “The Falklands thing was a fight between two bald men over a comb.”
- In Argentina, if you park on ANY incline AT ALL, you put a rock under your tire. Without exception.
- Manual for Speed is looking for information about why lines form at gas stations at night. Not just any kind of lines, we’re talking around-the-block and dozens of cars deep kinda lines. The kind of lines that require cones and attendants. The kind of lines that create community and spectacle. Event-sized lines. Based on our experience, they only happen at night. Please contact us with any and all information leading to an explanation.
III Etapa Seis
IV MFS X ZZK = LIFE IS RHYTHM
Frik'n Pedaling like a Guacha
- 1 Frikstailers Guacha
- 2 Frikstailers Dem Can't Stop We From Talk
- 3 Frikstailers Cumbianchamuyo
- 4 Frikstailers Cumbia Kamisama
- 5 Frikstailers Dancehallete
- 6 Tremor Huella (Frikstailers Rmx)
- 7 Frikstailers Venus
- 8 Frikstailers Mueve la Cuchi
- 9 Die Antwoord Diz Iz Why Im Hot (Frikstailers Remix)
- 10 Frikstailers Kepler